We live in a culture of experts. You can find information on nearly anything you want. The most sought out information is still for relationship advice. People are hungry to make their relationships better. Single people are looking for advice on finding a partner. married people are looking for help in keeping a partner. Divorced people are looking for advice on not being with their previous partners. The advice runs the gambit from financial habits to sexual habits as ways to find and keep a relationship.
Although most advice has some string of truth in it, very little of the prevailing advice gets to the heart of the matter. The advice I received years ago was simple and straight to the point.
First, be the kind of person that someone wants to be in a relationship with. This will require a great deal of introspection and often times change. The harsh light of self-truth can be debilitating. We all want to think of ourselves as a “gift” to the opposite sex. But more than likely we, in our current state are more likely to be a burden than a gift. This introspection exercise requires that we see ourselves as we are, and also how God sees us in our full potential. The second part of the exercise will encourage us to forge ahead with changes in our ourself that need to be made.
Secondly, make sure you marry the right person. Is the person you are getting in the relationship with going the same direction as you. Do you value the same things? Are you on the “same page” in the most important things like faith, children, finances, sex? Do you have the same picture of your future together? Are you a “homebody?” Are they someone that wants to travel and see the world!! Differences at the beginning of a relationship may seem new and exciting but if you are planning on building a life with this person it might behoove you to be in agreement on the big things. Too many people make the mistake of thinking that their partner will change, or “grow out” of some of the things they want now. But all too often this is not the case.
The advice is simple, be the right person and find the right person.